"I walk before God simply, in faith, with humility, and with love. I apply myself diligently to do nothing and think nothing which may displease Him. I hope that when I have done what I can, He will do with me what He pleases." 
... Brother Lawrence

i have been reading Practicing His Presence. i feel an

odd yet exciting urgency to live what Paul said in 

1 Corinthians 2:2For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.

And again i am so thankful for the grace of God.


i have read 1 John about three times in the last two weeks.
Each time there is a verse or two that GRABS my attention!

This time it was these two:
1 John 5:21:

 21 Dear children, keep away from anything that might take God’s place in your hearts.

and 1 John 3:20:

20 Even if we feel guilty, God is greater than our feelings, and he knows everything.

i love 5:21 because it is a continual reminder to have NO idols. For some reason it's easy for me to put things before Christ in my life even though i know ultimately He is the only thing that will truly fulfill me.

i love 3:20 because it's helpful to me, being a girl :) 

Even though i am NOT an outwardly emotional girl i still tend to rely on my feelings a lot... my emotions a lot. i LOVE this verse. God is greater than my feelings! It's encouraging. 

He is so constant. So faithful! 


p.s. http://www.myspace.com/cameronernst

 ( this is my friend cameron... you should listen to his music. He's good and i'm so proud of him!!!)


dang you emily.

The Game
Here are the rules:
1. the rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. each player answers the questions about himself or herself.
3. at the end of the post, the player then tags five people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

1. ten years ago I was doing...
well i was ten years old... this means i had no life, i played in the ditch outside my house all the time and i was a major tom-boy.

2. Five Things on Today's To Do List:
1. fly home.
2. spend much-needed time with my Jesus.
3. pass out cheap gifts from cali.
4. get sick from being on a plane.
5. drink cooooffee!!!

3. Things I'd do if I were a billionaire
i would pay off my loans... and give money away. and be cool... wow, these are the worst answers EVER. i hate this game.

4. Three Bad Habits...
1. i twirl my hair constantly.
2. i am a VERY aggressive driver.
3. i say about three phrases over and over without realizing it... it's annoying.

5 Places you've lived:
Andover, KS
Manhattan, KS
Overland Park, KS
North Carolina
Irving, TX
Baker, OR
Roach, MO

6. 5 jobs I've had in life:
1. JCPenney (barf)
2. Vic's Popcorn (best job ever)
3. OEIE (barf)
4. Adrian's Cafe (loved it... untill it got creepy.)
5. NewSpring Church (liked it)

Wow... i have no life.
But i did go to disneyland today.


sun-kissed in cali...?

i was at the beach for two hours.
i never burn... i am a lobster.
It hurts to smile.
It hurts to sleep.
It hurts to do nothing.
And i'm a baby!
i am SOOOO thrilled... summer staff starts in two weeks.
As much as i do love these mountains, and the ocean
i still stop and am thankful for the openness of the Kansas plains...
i may be the only one who sees the beauty in them,
but seriously... it can be beautiful in Kansas!
i love the sun.
p.s. i'm looking for a bike... anyone selling one???


With Divine Retribution...

This is where i was yesterday... i'm in love.
i'm so overwhelmed right now. With summer staff starting in 2ish weeks
and just really missing my friends in Manattan...
i'm a little discouraged because i feel inadequate to be
a summer staffer. Yes, i love Jesus a lot and i know He'll use me, teach me, and stretch me in tremendous ways this summer... i think i just have cold feet.
Probably Normal.
On top of all these crazy thoughts going through my head i am told this week by a friend that places i have faithfully supported for years are getting their products from sweat shops. So i am caught in this weird, weird place where i know i don't want anything to do with these organizations anymore, but knowing that means it's going to be harder to get things, probably more expensive, and honestly a struggle! But how can you continue doing the same things you've been doing once you're eyes have been opened to these huge injustices?
So there's a lot on my mind right now.