Restlesness

i'll be so honest right now. . .
Sometime i get really frustrated with myself.
Frustration like this happens because i have such a restless soul.
i am sure that somehow and someway that Lord will use this in my life in amazing ways.
At times like these, however, it just stinks.
So on these days when i wake up and the first thing i desire to do is buy a plane ticket to some far away place, i am trying my darned hardest to put my hands out in full surrender.

"I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God's hands, that I still possess."
-Martin Luther

i am going to begin praying that i'll once again have the faith of a child.
Trusting that God's ways are always good.
Having faith the Lord will provide!

On a similar note, thank God for the Konza.

Hope is Coming For Me

I have yet to read a book that has spurred me on

as much as Practicing His Presence.

Looking over it again today. 

I've really been sensing the Lord in my life recently. 

I always do, but in one of those irresistible and joyous ways that I can't even begin to describe. 

I just want each moment of each day to be penetrated by the love of the Lord. 

1 John is still the cry of my heart. I want to love like that.

"Try to call Christ to mind at least one second of each minute. . . invite Him to share everything you do or say or think." -Frank L. (Practicing His Presence)

"We ought to purpose ourselves towards this end: to become in this life the most perfect worshipper of God we can possible be." -Brother Lawrence (Practicing His Presence) 

So joyous that the Lord extends patience and grace. 

He is good. 

11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.

12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood,

but against the rulers,

against the authorities,

against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

13Therefore put on the full armor of God,

so that when the day of evil comes,

you may be able to stand your ground,

and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 6: 11-13

There have been some extremely real things going on in my life.

You don't realize how real spiritual warfare is

until it affects you in a tangible way.

Jesus- you have been given as a sacrifice.

i want to give up all the holds i desire

to have on my life.

Life doesn't make sense without you.

Prayer is Beautiful.
The Lord's children are
beautiful.
loved.
treasured.
reconciled and redeemed.

lead. me.

You were as I
Tempted and trialed
You are
The word became flesh
Bore my sin and death
Now you're risen
-Brooke Fraser.

There happens to be one verse that has seen me through so much... that the Lord has been tempted in every way that i have. i serve a God who can empathize with me and that... that is amazing.

Ichthus worship last night had me in tears. This line :

"Sons and Daughters of the Living God"
That got me. i needed that...
Then to hear the words:
"Oh Praise the one who paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead."
Yes, the Lord showed up. The Spirit of the Lord is real. i know this.

On a very different note...
there's a new band causing quite the ruckus in Manhattan.
www.myspace.com/skatingwithknowledge

Peace.

Thank you Jesus for this weather.
It's beautiful.
-your daughter

He left the comfort of his throne to fight for victory.

Sometimes my heart hurts.
i can really and truly feel it hurting.
For many reasons.

*Satan has been getting to me. blah.
*Sometimes people don't give me grace. blah.
*i want a 4.0 and that means hard work. blah.
*i definitely hate letting people down. blah.

But i take a step back and i see my Savior.
i see how He is my grace. How he doesn't lead me into temptation.
And how He is my constant. And i truly believe this.
My soul is alive when I am in His presence.
When I choose to see Him in, through and around me, I become so alive.
And I can't explain it any other way.

This is why i can get up each morning.
Because i have a reason.
LOVE.
Love wakes me up.

Try as I may to chase another Lover,
I find there is, there is no other

All the other Lovers fade away 
Only YOU can satisfy 

And happy am I, to live a hungry life
And blessed am I, to thirst
My desire for You, it is my gift within
I am blessed, I am blessed among men!

- Misty Edwards

i'm so tired of chasing pointless things.